Добро пожаловать, Гость. Пожалуйста, выберите Вход
WWW-Dosk
 
  ГлавнаяСправкаПоискВход  
 
 
Страниц: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
Англоязычный юмор в картинках и текстах (Прочитано 36989 раз)
Ответ #45 - 10/31/14 :: 9:00pm

John   Вне Форума
Живет здесь
Москва

Пол: male
Сообщений: 500
*****
 
Sentences Found in Patients' Medical Charts

1. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: alive but without my permission.
7. Healthy-appearing, decrepit 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant, with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia forlunch.
13. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
14. Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you might like to work her up.
15. She is numb from her toes down.
16. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated, and sent home.
17. The skin was moist and dry.
18. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
19. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
20. Rectal examination revealed a normal-size thyroid.
21. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
22. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
23. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
24. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
25. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
26. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
27. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
28. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
29. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
30. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
31. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
 

C уважением
IP записан
 
Ответ #46 - 11/04/14 :: 2:33am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #47 - 11/14/14 :: 11:46pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #48 - 11/19/14 :: 1:03pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #49 - 11/22/14 :: 12:59am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #50 - 12/19/14 :: 10:14pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #51 - 01/04/15 :: 3:15am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #52 - 01/07/15 :: 6:21pm

John   Вне Форума
Живет здесь
Москва

Пол: male
Сообщений: 500
*****
 
Gandalf`s mail
(pic from FB, I just added text)

Couple more -
Re: Claim for unplanned bleaching of cloak.From Lorien WashPowder Co.
[SPAM] Do you want to enlarge your staff? From SuperLongStaff
[NOT SPAM] Hot sale! Only 9.99 - Kit for Wizard`s beard care. Free shipping from Valinor! From Valababa.com

 

gandmails.jpg (Вложенный файл удалён | 72 )

C уважением
IP записан
 
Ответ #53 - 01/11/15 :: 1:48am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...

Новая классификация: "напиток для ректального использования".
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #54 - 01/28/15 :: 5:09pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #55 - 02/03/15 :: 5:37pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #56 - 02/26/15 :: 7:22pm

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #57 - 03/28/15 :: 2:09am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #58 - 04/04/15 :: 3:37am

Black   Вне Форума
При исполнении
Персонификация Мирового
Зла

Пол: male
Сообщений: 1585
*****
 
...
 

Though I may walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley.

If you are going through hell, keep going.
IP записан
 
Ответ #59 - 04/04/15 :: 5:12pm

John   Вне Форума
Живет здесь
Москва

Пол: male
Сообщений: 500
*****
 
I can find someone here in town as important as a bass player. Улыбка))
 

n.jpg (Вложенный файл удалён | 72 )

C уважением
IP записан
 
Страниц: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7